Case #212

My name is Hakti. 

I’m one of the survivors of domestic violence. I have 2 children aged 7 years and a 22-month-old baby. My husband was behaving overly possessive and abusive. Because of his verbal and physical abuse, I had to call the police and he was arrested. I wanted to tell my story as a cautionary tale to others.

I was born and raised in India in a hard-working family. I married in my early 20s and immigrated to US with my husband. We were soon blessed with a child, and well on the way to realize our own American dream. But God seemed to have other plans. My husband died suddenly leaving me with a young child. As a young mother with a small child, I did whatever I needed to do to survive and raise my child. I eventually got into a management position in a large retail store.

I thought we were doing fine - however, my friends and family said I was too young and needed a life companion and my child needed a male role model. It seemed reasonable at the time. That is when I met my second husband.

He said all the right things, was attentive to me, I thought he was everything I wanted in a husband. If there were signs of his controlling behavior I did not notice them. We moved to Tampa after our marriage - Emotional and financial abuse started almost immediately - there was no physical abuse at the time. I now, know, as is common in most abusive situations, once abuse escalated to a crescendo - he would apologize profusely, I would forgive him and all would be fine for a while.

Some minor events would trigger him and the whole process would start all over again. My physical abuse started after my son was born and eventually escalated to beating me in front of my aged parents who were visiting.

I had to move out of his home to the apartment with my kids. I was new to Tampa had no friends or relatives here and not enough knowledge of resources and roads either. Through an injunction lawyer, I came to know about HFSS association. I called them for help and they came to meet me and extended their kind help and strength to me. They were always there to help me and my kids emotionally, financially and gave me strength and great moral support they helped me throughout as going to courts, finding resources, financially, finding a job, apartment, moving. They all were true saviors that God sent to help me and my kids. I was able to get an injunction lawyer, WIC program (a program for children to help with milk/diapers/child care), EBT card for food, School readiness program for my kids daycare while I was working. HFSS members were there with me to help get resources and support me in all aspects. I truly feel they all are true agents from God to my family.

I would like to suggest to the women who are going through or went through domestic violence. Please stand strong for yourself and the kids. Please Seek help, find resources and believe in yourself and God. There are a lot of resources available like HFSS, The Spring, Bay Area legal services, school readiness program, WIC program, EBT food program. Stay strong and help yourself and kids first then anything else. Always there will be a path and resources there for you.

Thanks to God and the help of so many good people and organizations I am in a much better place - empowered to care for my family.
If you are in an abusive relationship - reach out for help You can do this anonymously and your privacy is of utmost importance to Police, The Spring, HFSS or any other organization that has to deal with survivors of domestic violence.

No one deserves to be abused - SEEK HELP